February 5, 2009 at 12:35 pm (Uncategorized)
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As a middle class, Christian, mother of small children, I  felt a little judged when in late 2003, I had to go back to work.  It was not what I wanted to do, and it was with great reluctance that I gave in to that fact and took a teaching job.  At that time it felt heart rending to leave my girls with someone else- how would I ever find someone who woud treat them with the same love and tenderness that they deserved and needed?  I could only leave the question to God. 

A friend from church, Margaret Cox, offered to take the girls each day.  Margaret was a good woman with very sweet children, but what I did not know is that she was also gifted with the capacity to love other people’s children as her own.  Maddie stayed with her for only half a day for half a year before she started full day school, but Michal was with her full time.  I can not imagine a better caregiver for Michal outside of our family.  Margaret gave Michal and Hannah (my friend Anita’s daughter whom she also kept) such love and attention that I felt fully confident that she was in the best hands possible outside of my own.  To this day I think of Margaret as having given our family one of the greatest gifts we could have received at one of the most difficult times for us.  

When we moved to Memphis we were faced with the same dilemma again.  This time God provided an answer through my lifelong friend Beth.  Once again, my daughters (even Maddie felt this way though she was in school all day) found a home away from home and an extended family.  Ryan, Beth, Katie, and Jonah incorporated us into their household with unreserved love and warmth on many occasions and in so many ways.   

I have been talking with several friends who have recently had to confront the situation of going back to work before they had planned or who are going to start taking care of children for friends who work, and it has made me think of what an amazing way to serve that is.  Curtis, Margaret, Callie, and Tanner, Ryan, Beth, Katie, and Jonah will always hold a special place of esteem and thanks in the heart of our family for what they have done for us.  Many people can babysit a child, but few take the trouble to actually take that child into their heart and love and treasure them.  I am blessed to have found some of those few.

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Role Tides

July 17, 2008 at 4:29 am (Uncategorized)
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Wow, it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted anything. Once again, limited internet access is the culprit and a common phenomenon in the life of a missionary. We are currently in Denton, TX and we are really enjoying the people here. Two things that have impacted me about the people here are that they are really nice and they drive fast.

Over the last year I have changed roles probably more than some people have in ten years. It was only a little more than a year ago that we decided that we were in a secure enough position with leaving for Africa for me to quit my job at Highland Oaks Elementary, so at that point I was a working mom with a very demanding job. Then I turned in my resignation and I was a stay at home mom. That role was great, and a lot of fun. I was able to go to Snowden (the girls’ school) to volunteer, have lunch with friends, spend time reading and praying in the mornings all by myself, cook, clean, do some volunteer work, and towards the end, pack up our house. That time was short lived, but sweet and fairly uncomplicated. My best memory of that time was being able to pick the girls up from school daily, and sometimes having the Mason girls or the Gamble girls over to play.

In January we moved to Africa and my role changed back to teacher, but nothing like my role as public school teacher. It was like teaching kids in an extended family, but with the additional roles of being new teammates and coming back as old teammates. There was a lot of familiarity to what we were doing and where we were, but a big feeling of being in new territory as well. I was intimidated by buying food and cooking meals (just like before,) I had intermittent feelings of wanting to thrust myself into mixing with the Kabiye and involving myself in their culture, alternating with waves of wanting to lock myself in our apartment with popcorn and five seasons Alias (which was the only American tv show I could get my hands on.) Then, after the school year ended but before we left Kara, I found myself in the role of learner and “helper” as I got to know the work and staff at AED. I was mostly just learning, but that took place in the form of meeting people and sharing briefly in their lives, which I drank up.

We left Togo and came back to the States to do our national tour. We’ve been to several places as missionaries, tourists, friends, guests, beggars, and family members. We are now settled down in Denton and are experiencing the role of visiting missionary, which certainly has its perks, but is a category unto itself. Mark goes in to the office each day and I am home with the kids, homeschooling and doing the things stay at home moms do. It’s nice for the most part, but I can feel the presence of another shift in my role looming ahead. I know that we will be back in Togo in a couple of months and my girls will be in school and I will be at home and working in ministry. We will have to find a new balance and a new rhythm, so while I’m enjoying the good of being here, I can’t let myself get too comfortable.

Does that all sound whiny and complainy? I don’t feel whiny and complainy about it, but I guess there is a reality there that I feel a need to acknowledge. I guess its a good reminder to me to drink up all the good of where you are and let the bad slip away. Things may (in my case probably will) change soon and the bad will be gone so why waste your time worrying about it, but the good will be gone, too, and you’ll miss it.

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